Originally Posted by GreenMom
It if was not something he could adhere to, he should have spoken up during one of our many discussions about boundaries rather than agreeing to follow it.
Sometimes, we go into situations with the best of intentions and find out later that we have overestimated our own abilities. YES, he should have spoken up as soon as he realized that staying within the boundaries the two of you set up was not working. However, maybe it's time to re-negotiate the boundaries based on what you have now learned.
It is not uncommon to have completely different views/definitions of words and conversations (even everyday common words). It's okay and likely necessary for both of you to check in with each other more often about what each of you perceive the boundaries to be and give examples. Avoid all assumptions. Don't assume, he remembers all the boundaries, don't assume he understands your view of said boundary. Have him tell you what he thinks they are, likely this is where you will find the disconnect.