1.5 Years Later
So a lot of time has passed since I was last on the forums.
I read through this blog and smile at the happy girl I was when I last wrote. I am still happy, but the whirlwind of new joy has worn off.
We moved back into Anchorage, and I'm back in school. It's a good change.
I haven't spoken with Passport in a long time. I think of her every time I pick up my phone, which is a lot these days. I've been meaning to send a text, but there's a lot going on in her life right now, but since she more than a thousand miles away I am not sure what I can do except send a tiny but heartfelt piece of love.
I totally sucked when it came to Local Guy. I failed him very badly and it was not his fault. I hurt whenever I think about it, but resolve to communicate better with others in the future.
Mr. Unicorn and I finally came to terms with my feelings for Griffin, and I got his blessing to be happy in whatever way I wanted. This was a boon for Mr. Unicorn and I because our communication is way better and I feel I can trust him to support me in my decisions and in our life together.
Griffin and I, well, we had some conversations that we had been avoiding for YEARS. There were a lot of tears on my end, and some soul-searching on his end, and when everything was said and done things ended up pretty much where they always have been, except that we see each other slightly more than we used to, I kiss him whenever I want, and we enjoy the occasional bout of deliciously guilt-free sex. He's talking about moving out of state in a year or so, and I'm both proud of him and secretly devastated.
I am also completely obsessed with a reserved fellow who I'll call the Poet, who is a member of a weekly gaming group that meets at our house and who is most likely completely unattainable. But a girl can always have hope. Whatever the case, all I've wanted is to do is to see how much I can make him laugh. When we first met it was such a rare and splendid thing to hear that I was always amazed by how much it moved me to see him so relaxed. He seems a man who needs more laughter in his life.
His type has been making me fall over myself since I can remember. He's solemn and literate and extremely private and I am making my slow way to befriending him. He's like a half-feral cat when he arrives at our house, coiled and wary. He wolfs down my cooking as if he hadn't eaten since he was over the week before, the group games, and by the time he leaves it is with an easy smile. And I've finally scheduled time to hang out with him alone.
I live a very good life, full of love and fun.