Seamus had to go to the hospital for an abscess. It's far from the first time, but this time I'm in France, away and powerless. Being next to him in the hospital always made me feel so serene, like whatever happened, I was doing everything I could, and I was going to be there for him either way.
I'm not there for him today. I'm in a small apartment in France worrying, not knowing any details, unable to be kept up to date.
Last time he spent a while in there. I hope this time he can go home tomorrow or in a couple of days.
He said he'd send me an email if he had the opportunity, but I realise he is unlikely to have it, and he'll probably need a lot of rest. I worry, and I feel like somehow I'm failing him by being here and not by his side.