We just put LB's guinea pig, Wheekers Pistachio down.
he wasn't eating and I was syringing water and mashed up pellets into him. The vet said his teeth weren't doing their job any more and that he was actually a very old little man. So LB and I decided to say goodbye. LB and I stayed home today from school and work so as to deal with our sadness. We brought him home from the SPCA (society for the prevention of cruelty to animals) as our guinea pig and it feels good that it was us that took him to say goodbye.
It amazes me how the affect of one small animal can change a person. I had a rat I loved just as much and several cats, dogs and other small animals that didn't effect my life as much. When my big brown tabby, Trevor goes I will be devistated. Yet not so much if my torteshell cat (now Dave's), Georgia goes. I love them, don't get me wrong, but some pets hold special places in my heart and I am deeply connected with them on a soul level.
So it goes with people to. Some are huge in terms of presence and influence and others not so much. This has been my reminder so far this last six months. This seems to be what goes around in my head more than anything. Everyone in my life has a place in my heart, yet some move me to believe that our soul purpose in life is to be together. Some are laughter and light. They move around me and through me in joy and fun, others move me to work at what we have. To sink deeply into them and them into me in order to create something profound and beyond the realm of what we know is reality. All of it is worth it.
Strangely enough I knew that Pistachio and I were connected when I first saw him. His brave little heart was aching for a good home (as were all of our pets hearts as they all come from shelters) and I committed to giving him the best. Never was a guinea pig taken care of as well as he. Anyone who knew him will attest to that. I am proud of his care and the home we gave him. He trusted us slowly but by the end of his life he was eager to be held and snuggled, would lye on his back to be pet, relaxed in our arms and felt completely safe. I want everyone in my life to feel that with me in their life. However big or small. I will keep at it and stay brave even in the face of the pain it sometimes brings.