I'm moved RP by how well thought out your post is. It sounds like you are really growing again through this new dynamic (of being "out" to your family). That's not easy for sure-but it's good anyway.
I'm proud of you for standing up for what you believe is right for you AND for caring that it's hard not only for you and your chosen family-but also your bio-family. Only they can choose what their next course of action will be. But you have shown that you have fortitude and a great big heart and those two things are WONDERFUL!
I do understand exactly what you mean about the loss. I'm very close with my family. they didn't react like yours-if they did that owuld be very hard. GG was also very close to his family and they flat cut him off. So he's lost them completely from his life. Fortunately mine (and Maca's) has pulled him in. He's still going to grieve the loss of his, but he's not going to do it alone.
I hope your family in time learns to accept all of you for who you are, as you are.
"Love As Thou Wilt"