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Old 06-11-2012, 11:20 PM
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lovefromgirl lovefromgirl is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: The Great Soggy Northeast
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Originally Posted by GreenMom View Post
I guess I don't understand why the "kids, we're poly" topic had to come up at all. But then, my kids are only 2 & 4. I just don't see how the fact I'm poly, or bi, or anything else pertaining to my romantic and sexual life is any of my kids business. When my boyfriend comes over, it's no different than when my other friends come over. I don't behave in any way that should raise a red flag from even an older child -- but then, I also don't behave inappropriately with my husband in front of the kids.
That's your dynamic, and your definition of inappropriate. My parents did give each other hugs and the odd kiss in front of me. Not the sucking-out-your-soul kind of kiss (yeah, I would've shut my eyes and run squealing) but more than they'd give a friend!

It takes serious discipline to keep all the context out of your interactions in front of your kids. You may at some point develop a subconscious, subtle, but distinct behavioral pattern that your kids identify as "this is what Mom does with people she loves". When they see it with both Dad and BF, add it to what they've been taught socioculturally, and come up with entirely the wrong idea... Let's just say I favor open dialogues about this stuff before they turn into teenagers (who, as you've seen in this thread, often react in dramatic ways to problems that ain't).
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