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Old 06-11-2012, 10:43 PM
psychomia psychomia is offline
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 25

Originally Posted by Tonberry View Post
Personally, I would not stop things with the girlfriend. I would tell my children "she is an important person in my life, and I don't abandon important people in my life. Not you, not your mother, not my girlfriend".
If you just dismissed her when she's not convenient, I feel it would give the message that you might very well do the same thing with your wife or your children.
I really do agree with this ^.

my kids do not have a problem with me being poly, but the circumstances in which I came out to them were far different. when I remarried 5 years ago my son was 11 and there was all kinds of drama because he didn't want someone else to be part of my life. I think it was because of the stressors we'd been under... divorce from their dad, leaving a religious cult, moving a bunch of times and being homeless... when a kid feels like it's just one more tragedy to deal with, they get overwhelmed. they don't always have the tools to adjust to a new paradigm. do what you can to make them feel secure and loved... and I agree about family counseling. it helped us when we were in the midst of adjustments. now my kids pretty much take things as they come, including my younger daughter.
solo polyamorous pansexual queer biological female with Aspergers.
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