Originally Posted by Quietfever
It's more that my friend and I are finding that single monogamous people don't seem to be interested in us, and we aren't meeting polyamorous people who don't already have a legal spouse in the house. The polies all seem to be married and the monos all seem to be extremely picky and ruling us out.
I understand, but my question was, why is it a problem that they polies are married? Are they making it clear that you would never be able to have a marriage-like relationship with them? Is it because of the lack of recognition that would come from being the partner who isn't legally married to their spouse? Or is it because you personally don't want to date anyone who is married, or in another strong committed relationship?
I'm curious because I'm going to get married, and I would hate if it meant other people didn't want to be my primaries anymore.