Thank you so much redsirenn for your reply. I prior to meeting P I was in a relationship for 2 years, with someone who was manipulative, but clingy and controlling. Now with P I have this new freedom with him and I think hes a beautiful person who I do want to be with. Its true though I should not tolerate these off handed comments...I did tell him recently to stop comparing me and that it hurts me to hear these things. He hasnt said anything since, but he gets easily frustrated with my depression and doesnt want to deal with emotional things. I told him sometimes I dont tell him how im feeling because I dont want to upset him. He and I are different in that respect. Like you he is 110% devoted to improving his life. I would like to be as well but often my depression interfears with my motivation and optimism. Im not saying its an excuse, I am now on medications and trying to get the help I need. he is more understanding of my depression than the last guy I was dating, but he doesnt understand why sometimes I give up on trying to get better. (aka becoming stagnant in life). I really like your list and I am going to make my own. I never even thought of something so simple.
thank you very much for the advice