I don't believe that I was preachy. I did not tell her she had to be like me, or that she would be better off like me. I didn't say that monogamist viewpoints were invalid. What I said was that I (MYSELF, not that all people should) find monogamy would be like considering myself to be someone's property and it's not something that I would like.
I never once said she was dumb, or stupid or anything cruel for what she thought about it. She did however tell me that what I feel, and what many of you share with me was "wrong". She didn't say "jeez, you're weird" she said that it was wrong, as in unethical, as in it shouldn't exist.
And no, LotusesandRoses, I even said in the conversation with her if you'd read it over again that, and I quote, "All I was looking for was to be accepted for what I was. I wasn't saying you had to be like it to... But you told me that I had to be like you..." and at no point did I push the idea on her that she should be polyamorous, she did however say plenty of things that sounded to me, an awful lot like she was telling me that I shouldn't be what I am.
I still stand by my statement about Monogamy being a new invention, while the roman empire enforced monogamy, the majority of the upper and middle class citizens often took part in orgies, hardly monogamy. At no time did I state that polyamory was the norm.
My point was, monogamy was something that was 'enforced'. Polygamy is still non-monogamy.
Lotus - for some of us it is part of our identity, just as much as being gay, straight, or bi. And it is just as painful to force onself to behave differently. Just because it isn't that way for you, doesn't mean you have all the answers either.
Thank you BrigidsDaughter for understanding where I'm coming from. I never chose to be polyamorous, it just happened and has been like it ever since I can remember. I am not a polyamorous because I want to see other people, I am polyamorous because I tend to fall in love with people. Sometimes without even realizing it until I already am. When I say polyamorous, I do literally mean "many love". Not "we should be polyamorous because I want to experiment with my sexuality".
I would have been happy to apologize to "S" for what was said, and to try and work things out, but I logged into Skype a few moments ago to find that she had deleted me and now I am unable to talk to her about it.