Originally Posted by Tonberry
I remember I always thought it was weird to talk about "best friend" and never understood how people could have one best friend. I have close friends but I say "one of my best friends", there isn't just one above the rest.
Up till this point, I had never considered that it could have something to do with mono/poly points of view. It's an interesting thought.
Tonberry, I was just about to remark on that... even as a child, I could never decide on one! That created more conflict than it quelled.
These days, I have a variety of best friends who are bests for good reason. If I had to pick an absolute best? Probably CdM, these days. But he is also my partner, and aside from that we appear to share grey matter.
I count the close friends and call myself blessed for having so many, rather than lamenting that one-best-friend-forever thing that never manifested (er, partner excepted; that's so very different from what I wanted as a little girl).
And knowing I was poly stemmed from a similar understanding of people: how come we pair off? Why not share? I never felt lesser when I considered this, just happy to think that I might be able to participate in a remarkable person's life. Why shouldn't that include romance? You see why the first bit of my love life was an unmitigated disaster.
tl;dr Sounds like the OP is wired mono, hardcore mono. No shame in it, but yeah, maybe this ex should stay an ex.