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Old 06-09-2012, 03:56 AM
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Phy Phy is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Germany
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Default Sward, Cutie and Marrone.

Warning, absolutely poly related this time

Sward's inner workings. I thought about this for some time now. While talking about poly and what the future may hold, Sward voiced an interest in a mutual friend/acquaintance. Maybe it was helpful that I have always said that I could imagine him developing feelings like that, but whatever the reasons may be, I still was a bit surprised. It came up on a non serious level back then and I kind of suspected something from his side since who knows when.

She is totally his type. Odd thing is, I am totally not, theoretically ^.^ All of his girlfriends before me were small, blond, really slender, the overall impression: tiny and cute. I was and am the complete opposite. When we met (oh dear, I need a name again … ) Cutie is really just too fitting for her. Fine, when we first met Cutie, Sward and I cuddled her all evening long and carried her from one place to the other. Similar to how you treat little whelps. Everyone should know the special tone the voice is able to produce when seeing those little creatures. We still have that as soon as we meet her and she immediately flings her arms around Sward's or even my neck when we meet to be hugged and carried around for a while. Even if you add her arm's length to her body height, her feet lose ground as soon as we straighten up again. I like her, but she is not my type of woman for sure. Tooo damn cute

Well, be that as it may, Cutie is on Sward's list as it seems. There is no prospect in any possible way right now, but she was the one he thought of when I asked for possible future partners. Her relationship had just gone through a rough patch. During the bachelor party her boyfriend (the groomsman btw, my BiL's best friend) drank too much and didn't wanted to leave with all of us when the evening was finally declared to be over. She was tired and wanted to go home and there was some tension between them before and during all the wedding preparations as well. He said something along the lines that he doesn't care any longer what she does and that he didn't know if there was even some kind of future for them any longer. Seems like he finally spoke some kind of truth he carried in his heart. They fixed the problems as it seems by now.

But all of this got me thinking a bit. The 'what ifs' again. What would be my take on this, if Sward would decide to go after her, given the situation that her relationship really ended or the theoretical possibility that she and her boyfriend may be open to this. I doubt that I would want her around on a daily basis. Yes, she is cute and all, a nice person and what not, but she isn't the type I could live with. All guessing obviously, I don't know her that privately, we would have to try that out, but I think that she could have a side to her that would collide with my personal quirks. Nevertheless, I can imagine Sward having some kind of physical relationship with her (even though that is kind of hard to do, as she is sooo small, but the practical things aren't up to me to manage). I would need to get to know her for sure but I am not against this, when thinking about it.

While I pondered about this possibility, I could easily think about someone, I would never be OK with. Marrone. She has been an interest of Sward back in his teenager years. I really like her as a friend. But that's as far as it goes. I couldn't accept her as a love interest because of the way she handles her relationship right now. This speaks of her inner workings and values and it would be unacceptable to welcome someone who thinks that cheating is a proper way to end a relationship (Because all of us are convinced that she is searching for a way out without having the stressful conversation of just saying “It's over between us.” and be the one who ended it and therefore be 'at fault' for whatever she connects with this). I would be totally against him pursuing her.

As soon as it comes to my personal space, live and let live isn't at work any longer. I am such a controlling person, I realized. It will be extremely hard to find someone fitting into our real 'inner circle' so to speak from my point of view. Even Cutie is, right now, not fit to enter it. I will have an eye on things in that regard.
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Facts: 30, female, bi, v-type relationship with Sward (husband, straight, mono) and Lin (boyfriend, straight, mono), poly-fi and co-primary.

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