gene bean, you know your bf has no right to insist on a triad and no other configuration of poly. His way or the highway? Fuck that shit.
Well-functioning triads are as rare as hen's teeth (I am a hinge in V with triad potential but we are taking things extremely cautiously slowly). You can't just *make* one happen. Usually poly people date separately, even married couples. If the stars align, perhaps you will get lucky to find a woman interested in both of you... someday.
Til that time, you need to put your foot down and insist your bf calms the f down about this stupid burningman deadline. Way to take the fun out of loving and fucking!
Good luck with therapy. Poly won't work if your self esteem is rock bottom and you're doing everything just to please your bf in fear of being dumped. If he does leave, you will find Mr and Ms Right, when you get your own head on straight... when you are strong and ready.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37