Welcome to the forum, Chris.
As you know the terminology, you almost definitely know that the odds are definitely slim for you to find what you seek (they would have been a lot easier if it was just a relationship for one of you). That doesn't make it wrong in any way, of cours,e just difficult.
I wish you luck on your hunt.
Please check out The Birdcage - an open, friendly Polyamory forum for all parts of New York State
"Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." - Native American Proverb