Originally Posted by JRiverMartin
Ordinarily, my way of thinking is such that if anyone told me that they want to be tortured or humiliated..., well, they might want to explore --psychologically-- (as self-inquiry, as psychotherapy, or with friends) why that might be. But it seems that "the BDSM 'community'" thinks me rather silly and old-fashioned in this respect, or perhaps I am just not respectful of diversity? (a strange accusation toward a queer, polyamorous... etc., guy like myself!)
For me? I simply don't get it when it comes to the BDSM scene. It is extremely alien to me. I'm vanilla to the core!
Have you ever had freshly made (home made) vanilla ice cream made with real vanilla beans?! Oh, my, now that's sexy!
I have done quite a bit of inner exploration where this topic is concerned and I have several theories as to why I have this need....but it basically comes down to some tall psychological walls that I need to scale/breach to do some intense inner healing.
I have a place where trusting anyone is very difficult. (mind you this is just one example)....To be made helpless and be hurt by someone, (mind you in a safe environment that appears dangerous at the least) and then cared for and shown that it really is safe, would go along ways towards opening that door and letting me clean out the closet of head monsters hiding in it.
For me this is a journey of inner healing.
As for vanilla icecream....home made? Is there any other kind?