Originally Posted by Anneintherain
Really I keep my fantasies in my head - I think it's kinda invasive, the idea of one of my partners and their partner verbally fantasizing about me to each other. Conversely that's why I keep my fantasies to myself, I think unless a metamour invites a flirty relationship with me, they didn't invite me to talk dirty about them. I know lots of people don't have this feeling, but I can't shake it. Doesn't stop me from having whatever thoughts I want to in my head though!
This is pretty much how I feel, although I don't really fantasize all that much about it at all because I don't feel right about it. Their sex life is their sex life and has nothing to do with me (minus any fringe benefits I may get - i.e. increased libido due to higher self-confidence and such that comes from having multiple healthy, fulfilling relationships). Hubby and I engage in casual sex on a fairly regular basis, though, so I don't lack fantasy characters at all because I just picture him with someone he doesn't have an emotional relationship with and don't feel like I'm infringing on anything personal since I am always included in that aspect of his sex life.