I hope you read this or Redpepper lets you know what I've said. While I don't post much, I read the forums every day. My journey into polyamory is new and your voice in it has been very important, because in many ways, you are just like my husband. He's mono and probably always will be. He's rather vanilla in the grand scheme of things, as well. I believed that he could love me for who I am because you love Redpepper. Silly, I know, but it gave me the courage to start talking and keep talking my husband about polyamory.
In a very real way, I do believe you (and this forum) saved my marriage, as the road we were on could have only led to pain and sorrow. I understand why you are stepping back, at least I think I do, but we will be all the poorer for it. I wish you all the best luck wherever your path may take you.