Originally Posted by polyexplorer
Yes, we both are seeking professional help. I'm not sure of what issues my wife is seeking to deal with, but she is seeing a counsellor and also talking to a poly friend who has been poly for a long time.
Are you seeking help together? Individual therapy is great, but if you are to work in the marriage and your relationship, you need to see a MARRIAGE counselor. I will say that both my husband and I were surprised when we each heardwhat resentments had been building and what hurts we were each trying to protect ourselves against.
Don't really have any advice on how to get past the pain, I still struggle with it. While things with us are much better than they have been in a long time, I think there will always be a disconnect of sorts and walls in place and it makes me sad. We have changed too much and not together and too many past hurts.