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Old 05-27-2012, 08:49 AM
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Anneintherain Anneintherain is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Seattle-ish
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Well...do how sure are that you want to go there, and do you feel pretty sure your friendship can withstand it if it turns out to be a misunderstanding?

Me personally, I'd probably just not say anything unless I was approached, with people who weren't out as being poly or open. Especially as you don't seem to be sure if he is bi or only bi-curious (don't have much experience with bi men, but do know that lots of women who are bi don't want to date bi-curious women - too much potential for heartbreak if it turns out you get feelings and it turns out they're all "eww yuck I guess your genitals aren't my thing after all, nevermind".

However if I did want to go there, and it was starting to eat at me not knowing, I don't think I'd drop hints, all that vague signal watching and getting other people's interpretations of what is going on gives me a headache and often doesn't seem to get anywhere when the reality of a situation finally comes out. I'd probably just come out and ask "Are you two thinking of dating outside your relationship? which gives him/them the chance to explain if there IS anything they are thinking of doing (dating, sex, swinging), then I'd take it from there.
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