Thanks fuchka. I agree that it can be challenging to integrate another person(s) into existing relationships. Actually I was the one who brought up this very issue when he and I first started talking about poly. I told him that when I was married, working and raising children, I found it a challenge to find enough time for my husband, my children and myself, and couldn't imagine trying to add another partner into that mix! (When he and I met, I was single/divorced and my children were grown, but I was still working.)
He quickly sought to reassure me that it was very "do-able for people who love and care about each other." I didn't totally buy into that, but since I had no previous poly experience I thought maybe I was just looking for trouble based on my viewpoint and experiences within mono relationships.
I may not have had any poly experience, but I think I was much more realistic than he was about what might be involved in trying to make poly relationships work...to try and meet the needs of the various people involved. DAMN...sometimes it really sucks to be right!