swingers or polys? what do we call it?
We have been married for 17 years. About 2 years ago we introduced other people into our bedroom. Initially, we only intended to "swing" but one guy we met we have continued to see for over 2 years now. We have not been exclusive with him and he is aware of this. He is in a sexless marriage and she doesn't know that he is "playing" with us but we are all friends now because he wanted us to be.
For the most part we have avoided defining our "relationship". We don't know what to call it and haven't found a term we like. It has taken us a while to even call it a relationship. We are hoping to connect on here with others who may be able to relate to what we are going through.
One question that had arisen recently is about jealousy. We have always been in the same room for all sexual contact (threesomes). Our friend has brought up the issue of one on one with her and that is where the jealousy issue is now coming up. He can see that logically it should be no different as the two of them have had sex many times but emotionally it is troubling.
She doesn't necessarily want or need one on one with our friend but she wants to fulfill the needs of both men and respect everyone's feelings. She doesn't want anyone to get hurt.
Anyways, it is complicated and would appreciate any suggestions, feedback, etc... We look forward to getting to know all of you.