(Advice going into my first serious relationship!)
Okay, so, I know there's a thread somewhere specifically for posting our own stories, and if this relationship goes anywhere I'll find that thread and put the updates there.
BUT, for now... well, I'll go into my story in a minute, but I'm pretty sure I could use any advice you've got. lol
I'm 18. I found out I was poly a few years ago when I fell in love with a couple (13 and 17 years older than me)... I was head over heels and told them I liked them when I was 16... well, a number of problems with that (I was a minor, they met me when I was 12, she was originally my teacher... yeah... they became my godparents...) but mainly, they thought of me as family and turned me down for anything else (ever. Followed by a lot of awkward silence and edgy couple years.)
Well, I'm pretty much past mooning over that at this point (I figured some background couldn't hurt, I think their rejection is part of why I'm so nervous now), but now I'm back in poly-lovesick-puppy-mode. New couple...
Well, there are some complications with this couple too. But aren't there always? Oh and apparently teachers are my type >.<
I don't want to use names, and they actually both have the same first initials. And last initials, obviously. So from now on he is A, and she is E. (second letter of their first names, lol)
A is a teacher at my community college. I haven't been in any of his classes, but it's possible I'll end up in one before I graduate. I know him from a couple of clubs, and because my uncle introduced me to A and E (and their two adorable kiddos) when I first moved to the area last fall.
E is his lovely wife, who I know just as well as I know him because she's at all the club meetings and events.
I've been crushing on A since sometime last fall, and I've considered them both very close friends (in the closeted "this person means so much to me but I'm probably just someone in the crowd"-way) and (have not totally been aware of it, but in retrospect) have been falling for them, but just as I was leaving town for the summer, things started to escalate.
E mentioned polyamory in passing, and asked me "don't you think it would be great" from a kids-having-many-parents angle. I didn't catch on at first, but before I left we met for ice-cream, and hugged a lot, and she told me that they loved me, and the next day when I was driving he texted me "We <3 U", and then the goofy-flirty-talk on facebook got a little beyond subtle (E suggested I read a book, but in process managed to say that she thinks about me when she read about gay sex, and to imply that I'm "incredible" and "all over the place"... again, in a sorta joking way, but doesn't that sound a *wee bit* flirty?)
Oh, and A wrote someone
(it's addressed to "WL", but that's neither my initials or his wife's, I'm guessing it's short for a nickname, but whose??) a poem that's just too freakin' good to be true. Honestly, I think that's part of the reason I'm still not sure what their deal is- that poem is too good to be true.
It's gotten to the point where I'm pretty sure either 1) It is so obvious that the only reason I doubt it is because I'm afraid to get my hopes up (see the godparents-story above
), or 2) I am making the whole thing up and the only reason I believe it is because I want to. Pretty suck-y mental place to be, but we'll work it out, or talk it out, or something. (Although if anyone can tell me if it's 1 or 2, that'd be cool too lol) I mean, I'm nervous, but I'm not gonna let them get away just 'cause I'm scared.
What I really want advice about is... this would be my first relationship in 4 years. And it has a lot more potential to be serious than any of the earlier ones.
Yeah, I'm 18, and no, I'm not sure if I'll be with these people for the rest of my life... but I really, really
like them, and I think I'm about ready to see where it can go. I don't know exactly what I want, and I'm trying to figure out what I want, and I can't say I know quite what to expect... just, if my situation prompted you to think of anything, please tell me! I could use advice, or encouragement, or even some well-deserved warnings, although I can't say I'm looking forward to warnings... just, I appreciate being able to bounce this off you guys! Any suggestions of what I should be thinking about?