Newpoly1stwife, thanks so much for your thoughts. My intention is to move very slowly and carefully with this, Kathy and I are leaving to go on vacation Friday, for a week or so and will be out of town, Rita is also going out of town (not with us). It will be about 2 weeks at least before Kathy and Rita can meet, unless we get together within the next 4 days. I think waiting until we get back can hurt nothing. It will give me more time to talk to Kathy and understand her feelings on it. We are nowhere close to discussing how time is divided. I am not sure if a poly relationship is a possibility at all with Kathy or Rita. I think Rita is more open to it than Kathy. I do not want to create problems between my wife and I, I truly love her and we have accomplished a lot together. I am also in love with Rita, i feel she is truly a soul mate to me. I cannot imagine my life without both, Kathy and Rita. I realize that a poly relationship between the three of us my not happen, and I will deal with that of need be.