Originally Posted by psychomia
I've had a very graphic metaphor in mind since I realized I could love more than one, and that's of my heart being ripped in two for no reason..
Here's how I've come to internalize and understand love;
Love is an emotion, and as such is non-physical (not built of matter - don't get all "chemicals in the brain", etc). It exists (I do not refute it's existence for it being non-physical) on a plane that is outside the boundaries of our physical world (you can translate this into whatever faith you desire), and as such is infinite.
Example: in 2005, my wife gave birth to my son. Before this, I thought my love for my wife was the end-all be-all of loving "with my whole heart". I was proved wrong, and my love shifted to encompass my son (note; it did not split or detract, it expanded). Then, a year ago, my wife gave birth to my daughter and the same happened again. Each time, my love expands to contain all those I love, and the love I feel for one is unique, as each person is unique.
Now, if love is infinite (as I now believe), it cannot be divided. Half of infinity is still infinity. I relate this thought experiment as thinking of my love as a bag with infinite capacity. When I add an item to the bag, it's capacity never diminishes.
Great info, and my wife and I are in a slow conversation building towards setting boundaries and talking more seriously, not that we're looking to start trolling bars or anything
I want to make sure that, were an opportunity to arise, she would not hesitate to get to know someone, simply for fear of hurting me.
I hope this is not too brash or insensitive, but I find it interesting to note that you are self identified as poly and have aspergers. Do you tend to not accept a paradigm or such solely based on societal acceptance? You should read "Sex at Dawn" I think, it might help answer some questions for you. It is certainly changing the way I think of monogamy and societal norms.