"My gut tells me I can handle this with grace but that it will be a process over time."
I think you have the right idea there.
Blythe/Bonny, welcome to our forum.
It seems like your position is well-informed, even as a newbie (to this whole polyamory thing). I think that your attitude is exemplary, though I'm sure you have your doubts and fears. Polyamory.com has a wealth of info and participation, so you should be able to get answers to your questions here.
I'm glad to have you onboard.