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Old 11-28-2009, 04:30 AM
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Erosa Erosa is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
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Posts: 138
Default Where Does It END?

I am an utter, complete, total newbie at this. So if this is hopelessly ignorant, forgive me. (And help educate me! lol)

I was just in (and very rapidly OUT of) a relationship with a woman who was polyamorous. Now, there were several other factors that really came into play in my choice to walk away from her. (And her choice to do likewise) But one of the main ones was that I was concerned about the polyamory aspect as she decribed it.

She suggested that She and I be primaries and each choose a secondary. To me, that sounds fine on the surface. But havin the 'spaghetti' brain that I do, I soon realized; "Hey wait... if she and I have primaries and secondaries, then don't the secondaries get primaries? And their primaries would have secondaries? And those secondaires would have primaries and those primaries would... YIKE!!!!!!! I'M SLEEPING WITH HALF THE EASTERN SEABOARD!" 0_0

Now, I am sure that is NOT What she intended. But I have to ask; how do you work it so that this endless spider webbing doesn't happen??

I'm all for many, unconditional loves. But I don't want to be in an endless open system.

How are relationships structured in polyamory to avoid this??
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