I decided long ago, after hitting a wall and moving myself into our camper van, that I needed to make myself the priority. I had four relationships at the time and a son to be present with.
When I let go of organising and slotting everyone into a weekly slot it got a lot better. I now don't arrange dates ahead of time but let them come, I make time for me every day. My partners had a time of it but adjusted. I figured that if they loved and cared about me they would be willing to adjust as it meant quality time with them rather than me being cranky and just putting in time. Weekly scehdules worked great at the beginning, but the change up became necessary after a while.
I now have three relationships and I do burlesque, host poly community events and groups, am on the PAC at my sons school, moderate here and still spend time with new people (some dates), and with family. I do it all with presence and passion. It might not be lots of time but I make myself available if something big comes up. Otherwise I take all my loves into consideration and we all seem to be balancing well.
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