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Old 04-30-2012, 11:12 AM
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BlackUnicorn BlackUnicorn is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 906

Haven't read anyone else's responses as yet.

1) Define "polyamory" in a sentence or phrase.

The ability and willingness to form romantic/sexual relationships with multiple people at the same time.

2) Give us a quick snapshot of yourself. Whatever you want to share in a few sentences, including whether or not you ID as poly.

23-y-o bisexual multiethnic female living her dream life. Political, energetic, critical, a passionate believer and lover. Loves multiple people.

3) How many partners/lovers do you currently have if any? Tell us their names/pseudonyms and one or two things about them, including their role in your life (occasional fuckbuddy, spouse, romantic-but-not-sexual LDR, etc) and whether or not they have any contact or relationship with each other. Have you ever had more partners at a time than you have now?

Vanilla is my fiancee and my lifepartner. Together for one year. 20-y-o bisexual female.

Sweetheart is my extremely long distance lover-friend (thank you, SourGirl!). Mutual infatuation for over a year. Married, wife not poly, over 40s straight male. Has seen Vanilla and communicated a bit, never met.

Fudge, a lover-friend, extremely long distance. A caring, loving, part-time relationship for over two years. Single, over 30s straight male. Knows who Vanilla is, never met.

My record in multiple partnerships has been four in last late spring/early summer. Vanilla, Sweetheart, MoonlightRunner, Windflower.

4) Do you have an "ideal" poly configuration? If so, what is it? If not, why not (haven't figured it out yet, don't believe in "ideal configurations", etc.)?

I would ideally have one to two lifepartners, one to two lovepartners (not live-in, that is) and one to two lover-friends. Genders irrelevant, while I prefer women. Don't know enough trans/genderqueer people to be sure but def open to exploring that.

I'm very open to group relationships having more than two partners at the same time but haven't had success with those so far and it's not a priority of mine anymore.

Would consider temporary polyfi with the right people, but it's not my natural preference.

5) Are you out about the role of poly in your life all of the time, some of the time, or none of the time? If some of the time, when? Are you satisfied with your level of outness?


6) Do you think that some ways of having relationships are inherently better or worse than others (poly vs mono, heirarchical poly vs egalitarian poly, etc)? If so, why?

Consensual relationships between adults are all fine by me.

7) What are the best things about poly to you? What are the worst things?

Having a natural way to channel and express my emotions. Sharing joy, love and happiness. Hope for the future. Feeling the freedom to meet each new person as an unique individual with no pressure to fit our relationship into a particular mould.

Poly as such is not stressful, but dealing with self-esteem issues and pre-existing medical conditions on top of poly is.

8) Could you ever see yourself being happily monogamous?

Yes, with my current lifepartner. But only physically monogamous - I don't believe I am capable of emotional monogamy.

9) Would you recommend poly to others who may not have considered it? How about to your kids if you have any now or ever end up having any?

Me: bi female in my twenties
Dating: Moonlightrunner
Metamour: Windflower
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