uh, yah. That was me. I like to think I'm changing, but it takes a fair amount of attention from me to do so. I've managed to choose some men who love me even when I'm crazy. Some call them detached. I don't know. What I know, is that they show up for me consistently. Not always when I want, but almost always when I need. They just keep loving me no matter what.
When I was living with CurrentBoyfriend, he showed me by example how to keep loving, even if/when you're mad/hurt/slighted whatever. Because he was so kind, I made conscious effort to be kind. 'I'm mad at you, and I'm still going to choose to act in a loving manner.'
It's an interesting journey.
If you're a reader, you might find David Deida's work interesting. He talks a lot about women opening.
Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own...
Robert A. Heinlein
Me: female, bi, (formerly hinge of a vee)
with FirstBoyFriend (FBF)(moderately long-distance)
and no longer with CurrentBoyFriend (CBF)(who now lives in a house far away-with stairs I can't climb)