A lot of times I get the "he's just not that into you" feeling and worry that I'm just something to fill up free time if and when Marty has some. I know that's not necessarily fair of me, and I've created it in my mind. I own it, I'm working on it. But it sure doesn't hurt when I vanish off the grid for a day and come back to messages asking if I'm okay and expressing worry over not seeing me online all day, or hearing that I was missed when I had to leave an event early. Little things like that remind me that I'm more than a convenient way to kill time when others are busy and that I do matter in his life. Yay.
Bit by bit I'm getting better at this self confidence thing. I am getting better at not taking things so personally, and I am getting better at finding confidence within myself, rather than expecting constant reminders from those in my life (though when they happen, they sure don't hurt). This is all positive growth.
"This, too, is sacred."
I am my own primary.