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Old 04-27-2012, 04:24 AM
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NovemberRain NovemberRain is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2011
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Hey Annabel,

(just because I like you)

1) Loving relationships with more than one, as defined by the ones in the tangle.
(useful exercise...I tend to go along with common definitions or what I feel the commonly used meaning is)

2) I'm a goofy girl who doesn't feel nearly as grown up as she thinks she should (after all these years). Tall, as ordinary brown eyes and hair as they get. I have an annoying genetic condition that dislocates my joints (at its whims) and for the most part has me in chronic pain. I identify as queer to myself because I don't fit many labels. That said, once I found out that the largest commonality bisexuals have is not liking labels, I feel quite free to use them to insert or distance myself from groups. I'm a double libra / sagittarius moon/metal/rat (I think it's metal). I've changed all three of my names twice. I'm really vanilla, but quite open to trying stuff in which partners might be interested. I've had a very adventurous life on the path less traveled. I'm child- and uterus-free. I'm an ENFP, though extraverted, I'm highly sensitive, so a little extraversion goes a long way.

3) I'm currently the hinge of a vee with two men, FirstBoyFriend and CurrentBoyFriend. They are brilliant gamer geeks. I met FirstBF in mensa and he brought CurrentBF home from work. We've three been friends for nine years now. They're awesomely uncommunicative and have astonishingly low sex drives. CurrentBF lives next door, and thinks of me as his one and only, and suggested the vee for many years and was totally open to it. FirstBF is three hours drive away, and a total introvert. I love them both beyond sanity, reason, or hope. They are good friends, but I don't believe they've spent time together since we started, and the three of us haven't been together yet. I've not been with more partners at a time. I think about seeking another (it's been many years since I've dated a woman), but so far, it's only a thought.

4) When I was younger and inexperienced, I thought it would be fabulous to be with a man and a woman. I don't think I have an ideal configuration anymore; for me it's about the who. But I have a few years left, who knows?

5) I am out to all family and friends (well, all close family ~ I have distant cousins that I talk to on fb, but I'm not out by my real name on fb)(if y'all want to look me up, my name is the same in there)

I am out to a few girlfriends at work. Could be a mistake, but I'm not the sort of person who can keep very much to myself. I did go to Vegas with FirstBF a few weeks ago and my boss told me his wife was afraid I'd return, married. (I was friends with her before I worked for him) He said 'you do know there are other men out there right?' (because he knows FBF is my ex. I laughed so much! I adore my boss.

I am very satisfied, so far, with my level of outness. I anticipate that might change, if I ever get to go to a public place with the two of them again.

6) I think openness and honesty is better in relationship; but I concede I know a lot of people who have long marriages with bigger or smaller deceits. I don't think any configuration/orientation is better, I support what works for you.

7) What are the best things about poly to you?

I like not having to choose one over the other. As a child, I hated choosing because I was so concerned with fairness (I blame it on the libra). I don't remember when I knew that I loved them both, but once I did, I hated not being able to have them both.

What are the worst things?

Scheduling. Longing for the way someone's else's config works. (I am so envious of JaneQ, I would LOVE to sleep in the middle.)

8) Could you ever see yourself being happily monogamous?
Yep. I don't know. I was pretty happy when I've lived with mono partners. I love the living with/sharing a life stuff. I just chose really poorly for that.

9) Would you recommend poly to others who may not have considered it? How about to your kids if you have any now or ever end up having any?

If someone asked, I would recommend with few reservations. 'Know thyself,' would be the most important one.

10) Free space! Either leave blank or write anything else you want to say or anything you want to ask future quiz-takers!

I think I've used up a lot of words at this. Excellent exercise.
__________________
Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own...
Robert A. Heinlein

Me: female, bi, (formerly hinge of a vee)
with FirstBoyFriend (FBF)(moderately long-distance)
and no longer with CurrentBoyFriend (CBF)(who lives in the apartment building next door)

Last edited by NovemberRain; 04-27-2012 at 04:28 AM.
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