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Old 04-24-2012, 05:50 PM
JaneQSmythe JaneQSmythe is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Pennsyl-tucky
Posts: 1,148
Default Luckiest Girl.

I don't know if I've mentioned it recently but I'm just about convinced I'm the luckiest girl in the world.

We are about a year into our co-habitating Vee and life is chugging along. NRE has been subsiding (thank goodness!) and we have had some discussions/arguments over the past weeks that feel like we are "breaking through" to a deeper level of intimacy ("growing pains" if you will) amongst the three of us. I am feeling comfortable/stable enough to allow myself to let go of my need to keep Dude at arm's length, to let go of my "this is temporary" defensive mindset - he's not planning on going anywhere soon, if ever. (Which, to be fair, he has said all along - he says he doesn't do "half-assed" relationships...) To stop worrying incessantly whether MrS is "really okay" - he's not going anywhere either. We are all growing and learning and being with each other.

How did this reclusive introvert bookworm hermit manage to attract two men who complement her and each other so well...without even looking? (I really must have been some type of awesome person in a previous life to deserve what the karmic winds have thrown my way...)

I'm happy in this minute. Not bursting with excitement, not deliriously grinning, not sparking and glowing with passion. Just...really really happy down to the center of my core. (I came home from work and the boys are both sleeping, I look at them each and smile - they are so beautiful to me in this moment.)

Well, there is work for me to do, I should break out of this reverie - I just wanted to stop a minute and express my gratitude and happiness into the ether. Thank you world!

JaneQ
__________________
Me: poly bi female, in an "open-but-not-looking" Vee-plus with -
MrS: hetero polyflexible male, live-in husband (21+ yrs)
Dude: hetero poly male, live-in boyfriend (3+ yrs) and MrS's best friend
Lotus: poly bi female, "it's complicated" relationships with Dude/JaneQ/MrS (1+ years)
TT: poly bi male, married to Lotus, FB with JaneQ
VV and MsJ: bi-women with male primaries, LTR LDR FWBs to JaneQ


My poly blogs here:
The Journey of JaneQSmythe
The Notebook of JaneQSmythe
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