I'm sorry if my opinion sounded harsh to you. I didn't take any time to couch it in polite language as I'd certainly have done in a face-to-face conversation. I could say, such are the perils of the internet, but that also probably wouldn't be helpful.
So, if you'll indulge me, instead I'll ask some questions whose answers I hope will help me see you as a more complete person than the quick generalized mental image I've created of you from the 2 threads of yours I've seen. Again, I apologize if the answers to these questions are out there and I missed them. (Such are the perils of the internet.) Here we go.
1. What is it about polyamory that's important to you? Why do you want to be polyamorous and/or have polyamorous relationships?
2. Why do you think you have such an intense, negative emotional reaction to the possibility of him falling in love with someone else?
3. Being as specific as possible, what do you imagine might happen in the future (which causes you to cry)?
All the best,
drtalon (who is a he and not a Dr.)