I was also really nervous about my first poly meeting, but I really needn't have been. There was a broad range of folks there to get to know, and the "couples" thing wasn't anywhere near as prevalent as at non-poly social gatherings. Most of the conversation wasn't even about poly, it was just social getting-to-know-you stuff, and talking about everyday life.
And that has pretty much been the pattern for other poly gatherings I have been at - yes, there is some poly discussion, but the main bond we have is that we just don't look at someone strangely when they are there with their two partners, or talk about issues with their kids and how having two mothers can be a challenge with the school system...
I have heard folks say that it's just nice to be some place they aren't judged for their relationships.
Please check out The Birdcage - an open, friendly Polyamory forum for all parts of New York State
"Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." - Native American Proverb