For me, when I hit struggles like that, it's usually an opposition between the way I think things "should" be and the way things are. I do a lot of work on letting go of the "should" thinking because I've found that it really holds me back. Interestingly, I find myself being stretched similarly by the guy I've been exploring a partnership with (he is famously out as poly and kinky, and not just out, but OUT as in well known and a presenter and writer on many such topics). While I'm ok being out among friends and such, as a teacher I have to balance being involved with that level of outness with my ability to maintain myself professionally. Which gets a bit more difficult to keep such things separate in the age of facebook and twitter.
But it's funny, once I started to let go of how I think things should be, I find myself drawn to such experiences.
Last edited by Ceoli; 11-26-2009 at 11:30 PM.