Most of the above was a few more weeks ago now. My time at home since the trip has been decidedly better. Iíve still havenít been too worried about myself, but have taken time to start making little changes around me. I started with the baggage...
No, not the emotional kind...actual boxes of old clothes, toys, housewares, books, and assorted junk thatís been polluting my basement since high school baggage! Itís been a disaster down there for years, and Iíve carried it across four different houses, 20 years, and two cities. It was time for a lot of it to go away.
And then thereís the IT infrastructure at home...most people might have a couple computers, laptops and a printer...but I used to be a programmer in my previous life, so my home network has more computers than the house has people, lizards and fish combined! Some of the machines have also been around for almost 20 years, and are having a hard time being relevant these days. So itís been time to clean them up, and make way for a couple newer machines that can actually play all the games Iíve bought in the last couple years but couldnít actually run. (My wife kept trying to get rid of me, sending me out even though I didnít have anyone to date. Turned out she just doesnít want me in the living room, so games will give me a good excuse to disappear into the office...she probably just wants some privacy for her naughty sexting with her gf or something)
It shouldnít be a big deal I suppose, probably as profound as a mediocre FB status update, but Iíve found the whole process somewhat cleansing. Dumping out all the old stuff and reorganizing the home around me to a better semblance of function is basically a physical representation of the similar mental shift I needed to figure out who I am now, rather than holding onto all the old versions of who I was.
Thereís still a ways to go. As with any project of this magnitude itís an ongoing process. Thereís still shelves to be reorganized, and some other corners to be cleaned, and the new server machine is being shy about showing itís hard drives to the installer. Likewise I still have some personal projects to sort out, like the 5 year plan, which less expensive hobbies I still want to keep, and eventually Iím going to have to look at possibly dating again. That last one is as daunting as ever...although possibly for different reasons... especially since I pretty much know most of the poly ladies around the community now... or more to the point, they all know me.
Maybe Iíll save dating until then next time I change cities.