MrS doesn't tolerate much touching. A few pettings of his gorgeous long curly hair when he has it (he shaved it all on Friday...and the Penguins still lost!) or a quick kiss/hug are about it. Doesn't like much contact when he is sleeping. I need more touch than that - so when I need contact I go stand beside him when he is on the computer and he leans his head against my belly...and I know I am loved without smothering him.
Dude, on the other hand, is VERY needy in the touch department - always wants to cuddle, kiss, hug forEVER, watch TV with his head in my lap and sleep all in a tangled heap. (One of my favorite of our poly quotes arose from this http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...542#post124542
) Sometimes I have to tell him he is stealing my air and he has to be satisfied cuddling my legs for a bit so I can breath.
We learn each other's languages and try to adjust...