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Old 04-16-2012, 02:16 AM
Precious1 Precious1 is offline
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 34
Default Time alone coping skill suggestions (mono in poly)

What skills do you employ to stay sane when your partner is with their OSO?

I am currently mono with a poly partner (Sunshine) whose only other partner (his wife) is also poly. Sunshine builds his schedule with me around that of his wife. I have been actively poly in the past (hinge in Vs), but am finding myself falling more and more into mono thought patterns of wanting only him, and more of him in my life.
I do NOT want him to give up the relationship with his wife, if that's what you're thinking.. he loves her and I respect their relationship. There is no jealousy towards her.
But I find myself wondering, would it do me good to change my thought pattern from where I am now.. in an awesome relationship where all my needs are met other than time, headed towards our commitment ceremony... to perhaps thinking to myself that he is simply a Beloved FWB who visits when he can.
It would be a major step backwards for me, but I'm thinking it may be the only way to keep sane and stay with this otherwise immensely gratifying relationship.

Has anyone tried anything like that?
What other ways of coping have you found, when you want more than time allows...

Thanks in advance for sharing what has or has not worked for you.
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