Perhaps if you told L that you are beginning to find a need to go underground with your love and that is not going to work for the long haul then he will sit up and listen. It probably would help if you were to spend time all three of you together. Bottom line is that he needs time and you will have to wait, keep communicating and be patient.
There are many stories on here that are similar to yours... please read as much as you can on here and elsewhere, because you are not alone.
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