Thread: Coming out
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Old 04-11-2012, 05:25 AM
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NovemberRain NovemberRain is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 712

I am a child of a father who had affairs with many women; and several of them came home for dinner. I do not know if my mother knew it while she was making dinner for them, or if she found out later. Some of them brought me presents. I had no idea that they were women with whom my father was having affairs (until much, much later ~ when I was recipient of many stories by each of my parents about the other).

I suffered zero harm from meeting these women, I had fond memories of some (those memories have faded now, but given the giant amount of bad memories, it's nice to recall there were some not-bad ones too). I suffered a great amount of harm from the fact that my parents had a lousy relationship. But being exposed to his lovers? nothing.

I don't think that will mean a great deal to your parents, but I did feel compelled to share that for anyone who might find it helpful (and especially anyone who needs encouragement to make their relationship better so that the children suffer less).

I would encourage you to be very very careful about exposing your children to people who criticize you that much. I remember telling my boyfriend in high school that if we got pregnant we could never leave the children with our parents (because our parents were horrible). Be very very careful what you share with people like that. People like that often believe they love you and/or that they're doing the right thing 'for the children,' and they do things like call child protective services.
Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own...
Robert A. Heinlein

Me: female, bi, (formerly hinge of a vee)
with FirstBoyFriend (FBF)(moderately long-distance)
and no longer with CurrentBoyFriend (CBF)(who now lives in a house far away-with stairs I can't climb)
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