So, CurrentBF has been more thoughtful and attentive of late. I like it, and it's out-of-character. So I asked about it at lunch on Monday. ['I'm not complaining, hunny, let me be clear ~ I really really like it. I'm confused.']
So he opens with, 'I know you're not going to run off with FirstBF, I know that.' Which (unfortunately) says to me that's exactly what it is.
Which, y'know, I'm kind of fine with. If he's paying more attention because he's got another interest going on with some other girl (and that's entirely possible), then I would like to know that. But I think it's a weird competition thing, and if it gets me more attention, yay competition.
He should know FirstBF and I would never 'run off' and either of us would be happy to tell him that at any moment. It's an occasional fantasy for me; and it used to be all I wanted (all those many years ago, prior to dating CurrentBF). But I know who FirstBF IS, and I really doubt he will ever want to live with another human being again. (if he's able to maintain control of that, and he likes it so well, I think he will always organize his life so that can happen) He would be positively miserable if we tried to 'run off' and I have no interest in making him miserable (go me!).
I haven't quite given up the idea of living with someone though. I have always enjoyed living with people more than I enjoy living alone. I very much like sleeping with someone more than I like sleeping alone.
Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own...
Robert A. Heinlein
Me: female, bi, (formerly hinge of a vee)
with FirstBoyFriend (FBF)(moderately long-distance)
and no longer with CurrentBoyFriend (CBF)(who now lives in a house far away-with stairs I can't climb)