Originally Posted by km34
Not sure if this is really the correct place to post this since the topic at hand doesn't strictly have to do with polyamory, but it is about spirituality so I didn't know where else to put it!
I see a lot of people comment on having been in and taught the "Christian Marriage" and it being a major hurdle to their journey to poly. I was raised Southern Baptist. My grandpa was a pastor. I still consider myself a Christian, although in a different sense (the Christ-like sense, not the religious sense).
What I am curious about is why Christian husbands tend to get a bad reputation for being repressive and completely controlling. My family and the churches I have gone to have acknowledged that the husband is the head of the household and ultimate decision making is up to them and used various Biblical references to back it up and whatnot, BUT they have always also focused on passages such as I Peter 3:7 that tells husbands to treat their wives with understanding.
NONE of the devoutly Christian men I know would EVER do something to blatantly hurt their wives (i.e. expect them to completely stop being their own person after marriage, expect that a second wife would be acceptable without the first one agreeing, etc.). Am I just completely naive in thinking that the Bible as a whole teaches us to be loving and respectful of everyone regardless of gender, marital status, sexuality, or any other qualifier?
No, the Bible as a whole doesn't teach love and respect for everyone. There are parts of it that teach that it's a good idea and what God wants. The Bible writers were human, though, and what they wrote was their idea of what God wants.
I'm a guy. I think stories never stop about men being bullies, simply because we are larger and stronger than women, usually, and we have testosterone. A man can't say anything agressive or confident anymore, or the stories start. Or another male starts feeling all responsible and bullies the "bully." The fact is everybody assumes about men, but no one understands men really.