Thread: Coming out
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Old 04-09-2012, 08:07 AM
learner learner is offline
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 41
Default Coming out issue

Hi all,

We've been gradually coming out to people over the last few years, mainly explaining things as an 'open marriage' because more people understand that term, although in our case it is polyamory. About a week ago I came out to my parents (and my husband has since come out to his parents, which went fine in his case).

I have had a rocky relationship with my parents in the past, and although they initially seemed relatively accepting, they have now come back with a load of issues, the main one being that they are 'angry' that I have introduced my boyfriend of 6 months to my (young) children.

From my point of view, there is no intention that he will ever have any parental responsibility for the children, he has been introduced as a friend and I don't see this as being any different to any of my other friends meeting the children. He sometimes has dinner with us, but again so do my other friends. Their opinion is 'but I'm not sleeping with my other friends'.

I was expecting some form of attack from them - this fits in with our previous issues where nothing I do is ever good enough, I have never thought through all the consequences etc. etc.

However, we are pencilled in for some form of 'discussion' at some point (although I have stated that I want my husband to be present for this because otherwise I will be bashed with no support, they've already started on me a few times), and we are going to need to resolve this somehow.

Does anyone have any advice as to how we can resolve this? I have no problems coming up with counterarguments to their concerns, but they are not people you can reason with - if they believe themselves to be right then I am automatically wrong and nothing is going to change that.

Many thanks for listening.
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