Thread: Marvel's Tale
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Old 04-09-2012, 01:42 AM
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Arrowbound Arrowbound is offline
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Originally Posted by Marvel View Post
I think that's why this has shocked me so much. I was to trust that nothing he feels for me has changed, but somehow hearing him say he wants to be able to have sex with others makes me feel like all the things he's told me were not entirely true, that he's been dishonest to me or to me and himself. I don't feel that way 100% of the time, but when I do, it hurts a lot.
This comes as a shock to the system because when you enter into a monogamous relationship, you don't expect for it to be anything but that. Many people are led to believe that while their s/o may have wanted others before becoming exclusive, it's not expected to be the case once you're committed to one another. So don't feel like it's uncommon. It's not.

Pretty much why a lot of husbands get flack from their wives for looking at other women, because they're "not supposed to". There are bucketloads of things you're "not supposed to" do when you get together, much less married.

Originally Posted by Marvel View Post
I sometimes feel that he is saying what he wants to be true, that nothing or no one will come between us, because this is the ideal he reads about on boards and in books. What I find hard to take about this is that a lot of those people started the relationship as mono-poly/poly from the start. They do not have 20+ years, a mortgage, and three kids between them.
I think you'll find the longer you're on this particular board you'll see the variations on life that people have. Quite a few of us have children, own houses, and have been together for decades. You're not alone; I promise.
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