How about asking everyone to chip in to hire a cleaning person, so you are not the maid? And then speak up when you're feeling dissed. The more you allow it and sweep it aside, the more they will think everything's fine and acceptable to you. Another thing might be to have regular "house meetings" for all three of you to air this kind of stuff - perhaps every few weeks, or at least once a month? Don't let it fester.
The world opens up... when you do.
Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me. ~Bryan Ferry
"Love is that condition in which another person's happiness is essential to your own." ~Robert Heinlein