This whole thing is very difficult for me. I guess I feel that right now things are fine, but if another woman is involved there will be comparisons and so competition and that I will not win in that case. That if offered someone who is thinner, prettier, and has no health issues he will choose her and not me.
I wish I didn't feel that way but I do.
And I suppose it doesn't help that being around pretty people, male or female, makes me nervous. I can't even look them in the eye.