Originally Posted by Heropsychodream
I see the danger in this, and so does she, but I think the major turning point will be when he wants a longer term thing. She doesn't know what she wants but is open to having him be a part of our marriage (but doesn't see him fitting into our long term goals). I'm open to it but only if he matures and thinks rationally. He would also have to leave the state with us... and deal with a baby (our goals). I don't see this working long term. He does. Someone's going to get hurt and likely it will be him which I don't mind since everyone has warned him. The wife is hurt less because I can be there for her.
Also, it sounds terrible but if he gets out of hand and he makes crazy threats I strongly believe the police would side with us.
I asked this in another thread, and I gotta ask here too:
WHY this guy? WHY him?
No one, according to this post I've quoted, is going to benefit from him even being around short-term. Not him. Not you. Not your wife. Frankly all of this sounds horrible. ALL of it. The rational decision is right under your nose yet you insist on future planning and possibilities.
The stove? It's hot. And you're turning up the heat to put your hand in the fire.
None of this makes sense. Apparently no one is considering his best interests here. Y'all need to leave him the hell alone and let him go live life around people who care about his well-being. This stinks of premeditated manipulation.