If he is telling you that his religion forbids it and he will not do it, why on earth are you utterly ignoring him, disrespecting him and his beliefs and faith and continuing with this?
Congrats on getting a few bones thrown at you with her relaxing some of her one-sided boundaries with you, but this still sounds very much like she is the one that is dictating everything that is going to go on, satisfying her needs and everyone else can just deal with it because she "has to be herself". I appreciate that I don't know all the facts and don't hear the communications that are going on, but this sounds like very self-centered behaviour to me.
In a good, healthy relationship it is still very possible to be free to explore needs without riding roughshod over the beliefs, needs and boundaries of the people you ostensibly care about.
If this comes across as harsh, it is intended to be so, because the more I read, the more disturbed I am at this situation. Tell me to butt out if I am out of line and I will.
Please check out The Birdcage - an open, friendly Polyamory forum for all parts of New York State
"Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." - Native American Proverb
Last edited by CielDuMatin; 04-06-2012 at 01:11 AM.