This is sounding remarkably like the relationship I had with Leo. Three years of once a month dates with no chance of more closeness than holding hands. Its very frustrting. I bent over backwards to get my needs met and the result was that him and his wife saw me as trying to control and being selfish. They thought that I believe the world revolves around what I want.
My coping strategy was to find other people to spend time with. I went about my life and eventually he dumped me. It was not a fun time and I wished that I had left the whole thing long before, but love is a tricky one and it is what it is. You can read about it in my blog from Dec 2010 until March 2012. The part that might be helpful is what transpired with the break up (Jan 2012 until March 2012). If there is anything I can be helpful with, please ask me privately as I'm pretty sure they read my posts.
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