"I'm just getting to the point where I'm tired of playing nice and saying it's ok. I'm tired of feeling like Hardy choses Nancy over me and caters to her needs more than mine. I hate how many times he's told me one thing but then done another. If I'm so important and he loves me so much then why the fuck can't he keep his word? He tells me we'll hang out, we'll do this and we'll do that. Then it becomes "This week has been too hard on me." "I'm too exhausted from the problems with Nancy." "I just need some 'me' time today." And believe me when I say I want him to have his "me" time. I just want him to respect the plans he makes me too."
You know, this sounds to me like you really need to claim your power. You are totally right with what you say above. We all train everyone around us in how to treat us with our every action. That is to say, if you are always nice and accepting, you are training your loved ones that they can walk all over you. It's okay to have boundaries and needs. It's even better than ok to voice them and let the "chips fall where they may." You can tell them about these trends that you recognize and tell them that these trends offend you and are not okay. you can take a stand. You also can do it non-confrontationally and even nicely if you get your energy right first.
The point is not to vomit on them. The point is not to make them feel bad or to insult them to make you feel better. The point is to get back on the same page, get your needs recognized (if not met) and come to a new place of understanding together.
I wish you luck and a calm heart. Let truth guide you...only truth.